Monday, December 10

I have a dream journal

well I'm starting recording dreams again but this time somewhere else so it's not 10 dreams and 2 posts in between...

Take a peek at my subconscious here:
http://www.dreamjournal.net/index.cfm?do=getjournal&username=psychoneironaut

Chávez is Bison

Compare:

Sunday, December 2

sometimes ii (Philosophy 101)


Sometimes I think all those philosopher guys have this same view of the world, you know? I think all those wise bearded guys that seem to know everything and have witty-snappy responses to everything actually have deciphered the world and hence their inner peace and characteristic wise-ass stance. Sometimes I feel like they do this on purpose. They know the fundamental paradox of our existence but aren't troubled with it's paradoxical nature. They know we must create a sort of story to rationalize our own existence and actually propose stories of their own. They know and accept the possibility that all of the possibilities are true. Every one of them is right because it really doesn't matter. The explanation of the universe? it just is. It's itness itself.

Sometimes I think those ancient wise Greek dudes in Athens were just challenging each other to see who could come up with the most fucked up story of how the world came to be. Think about it. There were even some Captain Planet-like dudes there, each one advocating an element as the origin of all things; Thales with water, Anaximenes with air, Heraclitus with fire and of course Anaximander with his esoteric "apeiron" (earth?)

But can't we come up too with our own fabricated weird views of the world? Don't we actually make these stories as to why we are what we are? Aren't we all then philosophers too? Yes, yes, yes.

As a result of daily human experiences and thinking about other people's view of the world I have realized that everyone has to come up while growing up with some story that recapitulates how he/she exists. Think about it. You have to have some sort of chronological montage of your perceptions so far experienced. It's a very personal issue. Very instinct-like, non verbal, felt, made when we are just beginning to grasp this weird universe we realized are in in our infancy. It's imprinted from very early, and we all do it.

Even people who don't subscribe to a particular way of thought do it. Maybe they don't read a book about it but they separate right from wrong and somehow acknowledge some universal mystical balance. When we go through shitty times we always wonder if it's something we have done; if you don't, well, maybe you should. This should remind you of cosmical balance aka karma. I'm not stating anything new here, folks. Even the buddhist guys did not invent karma, the concept can be traced centuries before, in Indian Vedic texts. You think I'm making this up? Time to read some Upanishads.

If you do the exercise you realize that all we can prove is that we think, and therefore, we are/exist --(thanks, René). Our consciousness is because I, right now, am reflecting about it. Do it, is fun. Our consciousness is our meta-self. No other being in this planet we inhabit seems to be aware of this. Or are they?

Does a dog knows he is a dog? does a tree acknowledge the fact that he is this woody thing that grows leaves and needs CO2 and sunlight and all that? Well, they DO, certainly, because the little plant in the dark corner tilts a bit to the light source in search for needed energy. But the little plant doesn't seem, at least to us, to decide this sort of things. Maybe it doesn't reflect in real time? Ah, enter free will. Why are these monkeys doing such a noisy rabble, what are they up to. The bottom line is that, as of now, no one really knows for sure why. But sure it's fun to argue about! So instead of discussing about this ubiquitous life force they just agree in their disagreeance and spend their times joking about it and having a good time. Philosophizing. And why not? the bottom bottom line is that almost everyone has got their story and history and has come to terms to their own existence, however twisted or different they could be. Those who do not are trapped in perpetual self-arguing and troublesome life experience in general. So why not just accept it?

Sometimes I think there's certain people who realize all this and use it in their favor. What? I'm getting on to something here. Maybe if one of those philosophical dudes could get enough people to believe their story... Mmm. Maybe if a lot of people actually believe his crap he could use it to his advantage. Maybe he becomes something of a leader of the unknown, holder of the answers to the quintessential question of existence for the ones that buy it. What if this evil Socrates sells it so good that a LOT of people actually buy it and follow him around like sheep doing what he says and even asking for more? Mmmm. Interesting, isn't it? What are you thinking of?

I'm not pointing fingers here but there's a lot of gullible people out there. And there's always those who seem to be just waiting for opportunities to profit of other people's gullibility. I'm sure you know someone like that. The thing is everyone, all of us, need to have at least some vague answer to this omnipresent mystery. If you feel like getting on your friends nerves you can do experiments and ask them. A lot of people become defensive, like you're somehow threatening them or something; it's really weird if you think about it. Go ahead, ask your mom. Such an important matter and people just don't want to talk about it. ASK YOURSELF. The majority will say something like they do believe in the imposed magical spirit of their determinate region despite almost never actually doing something about it, like going to the local house of worship or praying or something. These "passive hypocrites" are generally good guys who just go with the flow and just accept things; maybe YOU are one of them, we all kind of do it when we're kids and with other affairs, the problem is that this kind of guys are the majority and maybe that's why some people can impose their realities on other people and evil Socrates gets his way.

Of course there's the type who never thinks about it and, well, just do not give a shit.

What reality tunnel do you follow? are you a believer of magical men in flying clouds? perhaps bearded men with deep, sexy eyes? maybe you are one of those guys who is very organized about it and follow the teachings of a magical leader? that maybe wears funny hats? hey! you should've seen that one coming. Snap!

Maybe your deity cannot be reproduced in such mundane form such as a piece of paper. Or rather, it not only can be represented, but also look very cool while doing so. You can have some really beautiful statues too. (click pics for hi-res)

Maybe you feel inspired by some enlightened guy. All in all I prefer the chilled statues from east over creepy west ones. Have I hit the one you're stuck with yet?

Or maybe you just don't give a shit.

Which is perfectly fine because if you've been paying attention, no myth ultimately discredits another. Just subjective realities. It's all there is. Independently of what you believe, either if you are pretty poignant about it, or really don't even think about it, and never question your own reality, you have some notion of right/wrongness. In all works of fiction, good fiction that is, there needs to be the good side and bad side, otherwise the fictional world wouldn't be credible, the first matrix was happy and fun but we didn't buy it. So we realize that there's a struggle of people imposing their own reality on everyone else. The more you think about it the weirder it gets.

Smart people who call religion fables that sheeple like to follow have their science. Yes, folks, now we made it. This one time we have a good method. We can build nice things. We are on the right track finally. We made some rules so we don't have bias. We do things considering all options so we can make the best decision given the circumstance. But, hey, let's not jump into conclusions, we're being philosophical here. Do governments apply the scientific method? ponder that for a while. Do your personal authority or local organized dominator follow scientific rigor? who or what is your authority, now that we are on the subject? Is it in or out of your head? Maybe in the labs and on paper things look nice but in reality things are a little off. By a little off I mean FUCKED UP.

Did you know that no one actually knows what the fuck is gravity all about? We can model equations of how it happens and you can probably find the time it takes for a banana-shaped dong to get from the top of your house to your sister's head, but how it happens? Not even asking the more complex why but the mere how. If you look it up (no, I'm not getting this out of my ass) you start reading weird sci-fi-like things like space-time continuum and dark matter. It gets weirder. Multi-dimensions kind of weird. And I'm not even getting into crazy quantum hokus pokus territory here that no one understands (worry not, I won't).

So which reality do you subscribe to?

is it prepackaged?

or you made it yourself?

someone made one and you liked it?

you read it somewhere maybe?

I think about this sometimes and you should too, sometimes.

Saturday, December 1

C A T S

On average, cats sleep about 16 hours a day, which equates to about two-thirds of their life. In fact, cats get more sleep than virtually any other animal, about twice as much as most mammals. Thus, sleeping is simply a normal behavior for cats. Just how much a particular cat will sleep, however, can depend upon many factors, including their age, their degree of hunger, their sense of security, the temperature and the weather.

Think about that. Cats spend two thirds of their life in sleep, in REM sleep, dreaming, tripping, a lot.

No wonder why they were sacred in ancient Egypt!

Thursday, November 29

What's with the riff in Tool's Forty-six & 2

Yes, I like it very much, and apparently, Dream Theater too; has anyone heard Home from Scenes From a Memory? the riff it's there! and also, check out Animate-Inanimate, from Petrucci's solo album, there's a tune that reminds me of it again...

Does anyone hear the same?

Sunday, November 25

***read before parting***

In Dr. Leary's words:

Why you should smoke cannabis:

Fun, sensuous enjoyment, esthetic pleasure, interpersonal closeness, pure experience.

Why you should trip on LSD:

Increased personal power, intellectual understanding, sharpened insight into self and culture, improvement of life situation, accelerated learning, professional growth.

Have a notebook ready!

:)

Sunday, November 18

Start growing

Plant marijuana, save the world.

http://www.azarius.net/news/178/Cannabis_fields_against_climate_change/

Thursday, November 15

http://thepiratebay.org/tor/3884742/RealityPortal-TheMovie.avi

WATCH THIS.

http://www.virusmyth.net/aids/

If you get a test and come of HIV positive, then, you have done it, you're fucked. LIES.

Tuesday, November 13

childhood memory

In my younger, purer form (I remembered this while reading Alan Watts) I used to think that when one died life just carried on on different eyes without "me" remembering a thing. Now I realize it is very wise! :)

Friday, November 2

BEHOLD: READ: WRITTEN ART.

Blurring of words flabbergasted insanity --inside your own skull; torrents of pristine dust. And sacrilege through closed doors, I'm tunned, are YoU? like me, you can too, you just need lo lay of your old taboos, listen to me, young, brave man, the world is at your feet, if so you command; get ready for bed but before rememBER: that's the only place you'll ever bet, *feels more real inside your head* Are those unspeakable, remarkable and injufizzitedd with doble oreos things that NOBODY else would assume ever was/were?

Tuesday, October 30

Dear right hemisphere dream journal:

I have recently been waking up every morning, very early. Perhaps I've been reading too much about WBTB? I feel like it's around the same time but I can't confirm, never looked the time.

When that happened yesterday I awoke from being in some kind of jungle, but it was a setup, like some sort of filming or reality show, whatever, I was paying attention to this giant snake that became my friend :) Also there was this guy that knew everything about the nature and stuff but I don't remember who... perhaps Bear Grylls :)

After waking and going back to dream world I entered this really short weird scenario. I was in my kitchen with my little sister and a cousin and read this 2 times: I had liquid THC in my fridge. I don't know why, how, or whatever but that's one of the coolest things I've dreamed so far. I poured it into rice :D and sat to watch a match of football between Argentina and Chile (?) but I didn't get to eat it because my alarm went off. Dawn that would've been my fist dream high :(

Monday, October 29

my bed fucking melted (2)

Yesterday I experienced the same. It's VERY odd and it's something you just can't relate to a beforehand experience becasue I actually FEEL like I'm falling out of my body. I know it's all in my head.... but it just fucking feels like I'm slipping out and the feeling is very spooky.

Even weirder, yesterday wasn't just like falling "down", I actually changed my position (instead of facing upwards) so I "fell" diagonally down and to my back x_x

I never went lucid and my dreams seemed less vivid strangely, but I do remember them. One was about a friend explaining to me something like why one's more comfortable with a girl given you know for some reason you are not fucking her. Like a friend's girlfriend. Funny because in the dream said girl was actually this girl I know which I basically feel that way which, so I'm more relaxed and open with her than otherwise...

The other one is foggier, I just kind of remember this tricky animal that in a some sort of story with a lesson kind of way, tricked the other animals so he could eat them... I think it was a snake.

Next weekend I'll have a more serious approach to WILDing, I'll WBTB spending like 10-15 minutes out of it after having 5 hours of sleep; I guess I could come here and post something to pass the time...

Sunday, October 28

my bed fucking melted

http://www.dreamviews.com/community/showthread.php?p=566701#post566701

Saturday, October 27

bleh

Yesterday's dream was boring... two friends were going to fight in a parking lot but everything ended amicably, I even made chitty chat with the watchman and bought him water. Then I drove one of my friends home... U_U

Friday, October 26

{o_o}

I remember two dreams, in the first I was with a friend watching a movie in USA; in the other I was again in the US of A but with other friends, we stayed at this old lady's house who had this little weird annoying kid and we had to work in a prison by doing some sort of program with the inmates. I remember a lot of details but I'm not in the mood of making a wall'o text and besides, If I keep like this I'd have to release a book or something.

Thursday, October 25

As promised 1 hour ago

WATCH THIS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2ykoJqoIyw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zaj7cBNs7H8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_dipvzMUOsY

This is getting interesting

Since I began writing dreams, EVERYDAY I remember what I dream, this is exceptional since before starting this I just remembered like a dream a month, and I presume, becasue they had remarkable concepts... or I just assumed I didn't dream, which is wrong, we always do, and a LOT.

Yesterday I was in a house with this bizarre family and, it was weird becasue the house felt like an uncle's house where I spent vacations years ago but the mom and dad were not my uncle and his wife, they were mostly behinds the scenes arguing and fighting but I could hear them well. I was in the son's room who would be my cousin but he wasn't there (he arrived later) and at the other room was the daughter, who also argued with the parents and... she had this weird condition... this skin condition... in her ass... it was disappointing cause she kind of looked like that girl from that silly movie about a princess and her teen adventures, but I knew it wasn't her, she just resembled her in a way; I knew this but didn't realize I was dreaming >:U

Wow writing this reminds me of other dreams I had where I'm in someone's room and I don't feel I belong there, it's like I'm waiting and I don't touch anything because I'm afraid of breaking something...

It felt just like that, in fact I was peeking through the door very cautiously (that's why I saw the daughter's ass) and there was this time were the dad scolded the girl very harshly (now that I think about it, it was just like a movie about a teen and all that) and it was very uncool, I felt like I shouldn't have been there hearing all this.

But anyway... the son finally came and he did look like his real counterpart, he had his personality and came with a friend of his but he contributed nothing at all to the dream. Mmhh, if I lived in Freud's times maybe I'd have gone to his office for some dream analysis!

So this started the second half of the dream, which was mellower but as much as weird; my dream cousin, he had a console (I can't tell which, irl he has a PS2) and I wanted to test some games (I'd been peeking the room) but we ended up watching tv, watching mexican football, and is was very weird becasue everything was staged, like the plays were scripted for dramatic effects, like wrestling, and the mexican team's star was this chubby guy but still, I didn't go lucid.

The last thing I remember was my cousin showing me some magazine but I can't tell exactly waht it was about, what I do remember was that at some point he pointed to a woman in one page and he said this was my grandma! (maternal one, so it wasn't his too) and I remember going like mmm no, that's not her (and STILL, no lucid...)

I'm starting to become obsessed with dreams but the good kind of obsession o_O I want to go lucid so bad. At least remembering all this crazy dreams is very interesting and I seem to be getting somewhere becasue I think the pic of my supposed grandma actually send my a kiss (like those Harry Potter pics) so maybe it's a matter of time!

-------------------------------
I realize this blog has become a dream journal and well, did people actually read all my shit? According to Google some did, so those of you expecting to come back here and read some philosophical thingies well, those post take time, which I don't have right now so keep reading my dreams! or not, I really don't care that much :D

Seriously: I'll post some enlightenment for you, just wait, I have some videos...

Wednesday, October 24

This dream journal thing is working...

Everyone was hearing this guy from Spain that talked about America and the world and things like that, politics; he said he had a talent and that he had to benefit while he could because it wouldn't last long, he was convinced that people run out of their talents or something. He was very eloquent.

While I listened to this I was dressing, I had matching shirt and short pants, green and blue (funny, I can't remember if it was blue with green stripes or the other way), the weirdest was that when I saw my reflection I saw myself female, it was weird, I saw myself with long hair and everything, but it wasn't like my female equivalent or something like that, it wasn't like that, in fact I could see a very pretty girl, so I gestured in the mirror and all that.

Before that, this was another dream (first time I remember 2 dreams!) I was in some sort of race with friends, it was like cross country, it was fun. Afterwards we would go to this hotel where a family from the "interior" received us and there was a pool and all.

I remember even more details but it's foggy...

Tuesday, October 23

. . .

I had like one of the most detailed and intricate dreams ever but still, no lucid :(

It was some sort of game in a haunted house with Simpson characters.

Now I understand what they say about the vividness of the dream world, at the end everything went to shit and I escaped, I flew away. I could see the trees very clearly, the leaves were still wet from a rainy night. I looked to the sky and saw some kind of symbol there, like made of stars... maybe I should draw it. I was kind of disappointed because everything ended, Bart was killed and it was just me left, Lisa, although at the end I clearly remember the situation so it was me for all purposes; so I flew to electrical cables and electrocuted myself to waking life.

Monday, October 22

>:U

Argh I feel frustrated I had such a weird dream but can't remember well! I'll just write what I do remember anyway...

I don't remember why I was doing it but the thing is I had my computer set up in my room in a weird way, the monitor was on a chair and it was in the middle of the room, like if I'd do that in reality my mom would think I'm crazy... but the cool part was that I teletransported myself to a really weird cold place. It was very dark, like in the middle of the Artic or similar, and I wanted to... this is what I don't remember well... ._. I wanted to see or experience something that was under the ice, in the dark waters. I know that what I wanted to do I had done previously somewhere and I had accomplished what I wanted. I started getting upset because I could not do it this time so I started chipping away the ice. I could do it with my feet, I was strong, it seemed easy, I punched too (didn't hurt at all). Ahhh what I wanted to do was possible from the surface but it seems it was easier if I just got down there. Anyway after some good kicking and stomping I broke the ice layer and entered the water, it didn't feel cold or anything, it was very weird. After some moments I finally DID WHAT THE HELL I WAS SUPPOSED TO DO THERE and then, relieved, teletransported back to my room.

Mmm also when I think about it I actually transported to my room and back to the icy place several times, I didn't achieve what I wanted in one go, when going back to my room I thought of how to do it...

Teletransporting felt like I was being stretched longitudinally, I felt taller and thiner and then I was in my room. It's really weird and frustrating because there was something down there, almost like letters... o_O

Φιλιππος by day, assasin infiltrator, not unlike ninja, by night

In case you don't know I write my dreams because of the dream journal effect and I could care less if you think my dreams are interesting or lame or whatever :D

So last night I infiltrated some sort of house, with a small handgun in my left hand (apparently silenced, thought it didn't have one) and a larger, pistol sort of gun in my right hand. I killed a lot of sentries/guardians but it wasn't gritty at all, it felt just like kills in a video game, in fact I don't remember even seeing blood. I don't remember that much anyway, I did some driving too but it's all foggy... I must write more dreams...

PS: The dream journal effect is that by writing your own dreams you foment the remembering of said dreams, and it really helps because it's the first advice from experienced oneironauts and I had my first semi lucid dream in short time of using it.

Saturday, October 6

fun facts about cannabis

  • We have been smoking and using weed for thousands of years; fabrics made of hemp can be traced to 7000-8000 B.C., which is also the earliest known woven fabric.
  • In the US of A it was mandatory for farmers to grow hemp, in fact, between 1763 and 1767 you could be thrown in jail in Virgina for NOT growing some hemp.
  • Hemp was used for making clothes, paper and a lot of other textiles things. Yes, it's possible to make paper out of weed, in fact, it's cheaper and less polluting than trees, not to mention of course that chopping down trees is not such a good idea since they are basically the lungs of the earth.
  • It's illegal because of the personal agenda of greedy and corrupt people like power hungry ignorant bastard Harry J. Anslinger, who dropped some jewels like "There are 100,000 total marijuana smokers in the US, and most are Negroes, Hispanics, Filipinos, and entertainers. Their Satanic music, jazz, and swing, result from marijuana use. This marijuana causes white women to seek sexual relations with Negroes, entertainers, and any others." and "Marijuana is the most violence-causing drug in the history of mankind." which is the equivalent of kicking in the face, repeatedly, any smart person who has actually ever smoked it. In a calculated campaign, aided with yellow journalism and stupidity, he is responsible for outlawing it. Read more.
  • Parties who endorse the illegality of cannabis and actually make money off of it (inspired from here):
    • Chemical companies, like cotton industry, which requires large amounts of chemical fertiliser and pesticides, unlike cannabis which produces stronger and more durable fibers.
    • People who make plastic, many plastic products could be made from natural cannabis without pollution.
    • Timber industry - cannabis 'hurds' (the woody bits of stalk) can be used to make furniture as well as a higher quality paper than from wood (I already told you this)
    • Tobacco and alcohol industries, who continue to make profit of these highly toxic and addictive substances with the only inconvenience of thousands of people dying because of it. Maybe if people had a better, safest, non-addictive alternative to past their friday nights? Mmh but I guess that wouldn't be so profitable since people can actually grow it themselves.
    • Pharmaceutical companies who think they may profit less if ill people are able to grow their own medicine in preference to their many dangerous and addictive synthetic drugs which the same people claim are less effective than cannabis.
    • The employees of the criminal justice industry and supportive industries, including police, lawyers, barristers, court officials, prison staff, probation services, drug counselors, forensic scientists, customs officers and security firms, who may suffer if 100,000 less prosecutions are brought each year.

    • The fuel companies including fossil, nuclear and solar. The Report of the FCDA Europe - endorsed by Judges, Doctors & academics - reveals for the first time, the CANNABIS BIOMASS ENERGY EQUATION, which shows beyond doubt that cannabis-derived fuel, capable of providing almost all of our domestic and industrial energy requirements as well as running all of our cars without pollution, is easily a cheaper and safer form of viable energy. It is the huge oil and nuclear industries which have the main profit motivations for continued prohibition at any cost.
So remember kids, next time you're smoking a joint and someone comes to preach and quote lies and propaganda, literally say "FUCK YOU, I'M SMOKING MY WEED WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT" and proceed to show these and other fun facts. Don't be shy! In fact, print this whole post and shove it down their throat! saying "prohibit THIS, asshole!" But why stop there, make copies and paste them all over your neighborhood! graffiti it all over town! hey, that's not such a bad idea.

Thursday, October 4

GREAT SUCCESS!

I had a lucid dream!

Well not quite because it only lasted seconds but I clearly remember being in the dream world! It was VERY weird, sort of what I had been expecting (which is, nothing comparable to what I could expect), now the weirdness is because it's not like "oh, I'm dreaming", it's much more complicated than that. One isn't 100% sure if one is dreaming or awaken; it's hard to explain because looking back on it, dreams have very goofy things going on but, the thing is, when you are in the dream experiencing it, it does not seem goofy to you, you just take everything for granted, and that's strange, I guess that happens because when dreaming one is not fully conscious, only some little percentage, but the trick (at least for me) is somehow identifying those goofy things and thinking "mm... this is wrong." Well this is what I recall:

The first thing I remember was being somewhere and this guy I know, he is friend of a friend, was like wearing my fan as a mask! It sounds bizarre but somehow that guy was wearing my fan.


Ok, just picture some guy's head inside that thing, wearing it like it was no big deal, like it just were some halloween mask. Anyway, I guess the fact that I knew it was my fan (it looked just like it) set something off and I realized hey! I'm dreaming!

When you're dreaming it's not easy getting around, I mean the places you're are known to you but they appear distorted, it's hard to explain, things aren't your normal 3D view...

At the climax I began flying, Superman style, I could see my fists. Then I pulled out my dick and woke up. Hehe I think I tried to do too many things.

The transition from being lucid to reality was very smooth, for some reason I was flying towards my fan (I swear I'm not obsessed by it!) and when I woke up it was the first thing I saw; I point it at my face, I like the breeze.

Hopefully writing about these things foments more lucid shenanigans.

Tuesday, October 2

In Rainbows

New Radiohead album will be released on the 10th of this month! You can download it from http://www.inrainbows.com/ and IT COSTS WHATEVER YOU WANT TO PAY FOR IT.

Monday, October 1

>>>

I just remember 2 things:

  • I was in a taxi and the driver was talking to me about the alpha dog mentality of some of us, and this was in a very nonchalantly way, like "you know, the thing with those alpha dogs..." As you can appreciate I don't remember that much. I blame myself for waiting so much to type this thing.
  • I realized the other thing completely erased from my memory. I just remember I met some kind of female pot dealer (this is what happens if you query Google Images for female pot dealer)

Thursday, September 27

News

I have changed my domain name to vox-dimidium-orbis.blogspot.com in hope that people I gave the blog to, can't find it. I mean real people, as irl, as in people I actually talk to outside the internets. I do this because when I post here it's like channeling all the raw data and feelings that get pushed aside so I can behave like a "normal" person in font of other people. But here I drop the pretense! here I can dance in my undergarments shouting profanities and whatnot to amused-looking electronic faces, connect my brain to the keyboard and deliver whatever it is I have in me to deliver, tune in the right hemisphere and shut down the left for a while. This is why I hope my blog gets lost from public agenda and only exists in my little electronic universe. Well at least, for the moment.

So I guess I'll be posting more often with more insight into my personal babbles and whatnot.

PS: Didn't tell the aforementioned people of this for obvious reasons but too because I didn't want to hurt their feelings u_u

Wednesday, September 26

ò_ó

I haven't been able to recall dreams because I always get woken up by my cell phone or someone makes too loud noises so my dreams get erased instantly and I CAN'T REMEMBER SHIT.

Tuesday, September 25

"The characteristic property of hallucinogens, to suspend the boundaries between the experiencing self and the outer world in an ecstatic, emotional experience, makes it possible with their help, and after suitable internal and external preparation... to evoke a mystical experience according to plan, so to speak... I see the true importance of LSD in the possibility of providing material aid to meditation aimed at the mystical experience of a deeper, comprehensive reality. Such a use accords entirely with the esSence and working character of LSD as a sacred drug."
-Dr. Albert "Lord of Lysergic acid Diethylamide" Hoffman

Saturday, September 15

Social dreams

I have this kind of "social dreams" wherein I'm just hanging out with people I know. They can be rather dull or can have weird connotations.

I was attending to this discothèque after eating, I never entered though. I had a girl in the dream but don't remember her face so well as the blue-eyed blonde of 9/11. I had a lot of joints for some reason, I gave some to the girl and I remember getting upset because she gave them to another friend, who took like 2 of them and entered the "nightclub", which was really some fancy door and nothing much. It had a bouncer though.

Wednesday, September 12

Escape or Die

I awoke several times in the morning, so I had this series of intricate dreams. I remember being in my grandmother's house, drinking water. Later I was at this somehow evil corporation, they got us watching a movie and some familiar persons were there. Afterwards everything went to shit and I tried to escape, people were following trying to get me, elevators, conveyor belts transporting paper, those were some crazy scenarios. I also rescued some woman, hehe.

Tuesday, September 11

Chocolate Pawns

I'm writing what I just dreamed after I get up because if one doesn't one just forgets about it and it's practically impossible to recall dreams if you go on with your waking life. I'll reveal the purpose of this later. Maybe. First entry:

I was in a table sitting with some people. Don't remember who they were, except for this blonde, blue-eyed girl. We were eating chocolate pawns for some reason. I threw one at her face, got her in the eye, but not angrily; playfully, and it didn't hurt; it was a chocolate pawn, after all. She faked being mad but later acknowledged she didn't mind at all. I liked that. She was sitting across me but somehow got next to me... Maybe I pulled her near me because I liked her sense of humor.

Sunday, September 9

Omming dunes

Ok this is just one of those things you have to see to believe, or in this case, hear.

Brains

"The brain is the most complex organ in the human body. It produces our every thought, action, memory, feeling and experience of the world. This jelly-like mass of tissue, weighing in at around 1.4 kilograms, contains a staggering one hundred billion nerve cells, or neurons.

The complexity of the connectivity between these cells is mind-boggling. Each neuron can make contact with thousands or even tens of thousands of others, via tiny structures called synapses. Our brains form a million new connections for every second of our lives. The pattern and strength of the connections is constantly changing and no two brains are alike.

It is in these changing connections that memories are stored, habits learned and personalities shaped, by reinforcing certain patterns of brain activity, and losing others."

Holy shit the brain is some ultrasupercomplex shit. I'm fascinated with everything that attempts to explain how the fuck all that jelly makes us who we are and especially how consciousness is achieved. Read all about that in this special New Scientist article and check out other cool things they got there.

Saturday, September 8

Get ready to read some crazy shit


There seems to be moments when a person finds something in their mind that he/she wasn't aware of. Like something goes "click" inside their heads and suddenly "Holy shit!" everything seems to fall in place. Well, you can call it epiphany, or enlightenment, realization, etc, but you got to acknowledge the phenomenon.

I've read of people going through this states. The infamous story of Archimedes jumping out of the bath, screaming eureka to an astonished wife, I presume, and running around naked through Syracuse because he found out how to guess the amount of gold in some king's crown, THAT'S the crazy shit I'm talking about. I've had my interesting thoughts in the bath myself. Probably the fact that you're not thinking too much about what you're doing, you know, you bathe EVERY day, your brain probably gets into auto pilot and starts the "Taking a Shower Subroutine" or something.


But sometimes it's more critical. Like in my case. I had a "brain click" thingy going on but it's more complex than that. It wasn't suddenly. More like a process. But I guess I can trace it back to a single event. Pay attention.

I was at a friend's house. She was pretty sad because she had broken up with the love of her life, apparently, and, you know, I felt like I was in a soap opera or something --tears, drama, everything-is-going-to-be ok-like commentaries (from my sister who was there also, not from me). Me? I was silent. I didn't know what to say. Actually I wanted to say those hollow words too, I wanted to calm her because she made me feel sad also... or did I? I now realize I was trapped in an internal monologue, a thing I used to do. I still do it but not when I have people around, not friends or people I want to talk to anyway.

The thing is, I wanted to say something but was trapped in this limbo of words, cause I thought whatever I could have said would have been wrong or inappropriate or silly. But I FUCKING WANTED to say something. Anything. Just some comforting words... And then it "clicked". Now, I don't know exactly how or why but I had a realization. I COULD NOT SAY something. Anything. I actually did not have control over myself, I couldn't bring myself up to say at least SOMETHING to my sad friend! THAT'S when everything got weird.

I always had thought I had the power; I certainly in many occasions wanted to say something but didn't because of thinking it was stupid. Well what if it was stupid? It IS what I have to say and, well, you just can't go through life not saying things because someone might not like what you have to say, FUCK IT. It is my/your opinion and if I/you were wrong hopefully there'll be someone to call your bullshit.

I realize all this now. Back then I was just starting to sacrifice the sacred plant to the fire gods and well, my brain was starting to operate in different frequencies, different sates of consciousness I had never dreamed of. I actually FELT something going "click" in my head. Why was I such a pussy? I couldn't say something as easy as hey come on, calm down or something you know, it's not the end of the world!

...

Later that day I made some confessions. I was in a low point in my life and felt depressed... If I didn't had control over what the fuck I had to say, well, maybe, you know, I didn't had control over lots of other things! It was a really rare and bizarre experience. I didn't feel like myself. I was a stranger seeing myself doing this crazy shit just like an spectator. An innocent bystander.

I did some pretty fucked up things that day. I wasn't thinking clearly and started doing whatever occurred to me, whatever came to mind. It was liberating. I felt like I had been playing a Ned Fladers repressive moron censuring myself 24/7. FUCK THAT! I was constraining myself without reasons!


I thought about all this while still in crazy naked Archimedes mode. I wasn't feeling normal also; not quite sick, but not in everyday normal state of consciousness. Until the headache.

I actually felt inebriated, and with a sudden risky behaviour attitude. I started to walk with no particular destiny, I thought of were to go as I wandered. I ended going to the house of a friend somewhat near my house -didn't want to go there. I asked him for the phone and generally acted weird for about 15 minutes. Then I left and eventually got home. To top it of I even started calling friends like a drunk guy. I felt a little drunk alright, I felt dizzy. But it felt good to hear some familiar voices that actually care about me. The feeling of someone giving shit about you is very important and under appreciated. After a while I got a REALLY FUCKING TERRIBLE HEADACHE. It came and went for a while. The fascinating thing is that I believe it was psychosomatic. My brain was in distress, confused, like in a system crash. After the emo crash I came to a conclusion.

Either I was fucking insane an needed therapy, or something was happening to me, an alteration. At the time I really thought I was crazy.

Now I KNOW I AM crazy.

:D

I see the world in a different way, different of EVERY people I know. But who does see everything exactly as others? Isn't people subjective individuals going through subjective experiences? Damn right they are. Everybody is fucking crazy. In your daily life you've probably come across a lot of lunatics who made you think "ok, what fuck it's going through their brains." But everyone operates in their own particular ways. High or low and all the in-betweens and out-betweens. And well, that's the beauty of it, isn't it? If everyone looked at the same things and made the same conclusions, well, what a boring and stupid world. That's how I came to sense, realizing everyone is just as crazy as the next one, every mind sees things in ways I couldn't even begin to imagine, and that's cool. What are we but our peculiarities? :)

Certainly, seeing though your own bullshit is no small feat. I'm sure there are people who live their entire life without ever questioning their own bullshit. They are probably egocentric assholes.

Depersonalization, looking at your own self, losing the ego and seeing that you're just a clueless creature wandering through existence bumping with things as they get to you its one of the best experiences you can have. It's no easy task, but thanks to some mind altering friends, we have some tools to aid in the mission. But there is an ample array of methods to achieve this mind-click. You can stop whatever you're doing right now and simply sit stubbornly until you find out what I'm talking about. Literally, without moving or eating or anything, ala Siddhārtha.

You can shut down all exterior stimuli with one of these wonders*. You can try lucid dreaming, or meditating. It works if you get one of those really crazy high fevers. Or try don't sleeping at all for a week, or don't eat. You can can be blessed/cursed with a near death experience. There are even some cases were people get beamed just because, spontaneously, out of fucking nowhere. There are many more forms.
Some involve ingesting truly mystic substances; this topic by far exceeds the scope of this post. But to summarize, there are some compounds out there that when you experiment with can get up to your brain and twist and move shit about and make you think things you normally don't. Read THIS to know more about about what I'm saying. Hear THIS if you haven't already gotten a grasp of what I'm talking about. That guy knows how to express himself, say something really cool and meaningful and be funny at the same time. Or read THIS previous post.

So it's really just a matter of getting out and doing it.

I've never tried DMT or any other super potent psychedelic substance, like LSD or magic mushrooms. But I'm planning on doing it and hopefully I'll write about my experiences here.

···UPDATE {tried LSD, post in progress}···

Have you experienced an altered state of consciousness? If no, what's stopping you?

...

There are drugs that allow glimpses into this fascinating and mysterious experience; if you want to, fuck it, it's the most natural thing theres is, other earthlings get high, why shouldn't you?

Note: If you think you note different moods sometimes in some paragraphs, it might be that I added, besides the obvious one, small updates of style here and there 8 moths later ;)

*I was going to write a full post about this but Joe Rogan got ahead of me :/

Sunday, September 2

Of Perception...

...to be enlightened is to be aware, always, of total reality in its immanent otherness - to be aware of it and yet to remain in a condition to survive as an animal, to think and feel as a human being, to resort whenever expedient to systematic reasoning. Our goal is to discover that we have always been where we ought to be. Unhappily we make the task exceedingly difficult for ourselves. Meanwhile, however, there are gratuitous graces in the form of partial and fleeting realizations. Under a more realistic, a less exclusively verbal system of education than ours, every Angel (in Blake's sense of that word) would be permitted as a sabbatical treat, would be urged and even, if necessary, compelled to take an occasional trip through some chemical Door in the Wall into the world of transcendental experience. If it terrified him, it would be unfortunate but probably salutary. If it brought him a brief but timeless illumination, so much the better. In either case the Angel might lose a little of the confident insolence sprouting from systematic reasoning and the consciousness of having read all the books. Near the end of his life Aquinas experienced Infused Contemplation. Thereafter he refused to go back to work on his unfinished book. Compared with this, everything he had read and argued about and written - Aristotle and the Sentences, the Questions, the Propositions, the majestic Summas-was no better than chaff or straw, For most intellectuals such a sit-down strike would be inadvisable, even morally wrong. But the Angelic Doctor had done more systematic reasoning than any twelve ordinary Angels, and was already ripe for death. He had earned the right, in those last months of his mortality, to turn away from merely symbolic straw and chaff to the bread of actual and substantial Fact. For Angels of a lower order and with better prospects of longevity, there must be a return to the straw. But the man who comes back through the Door in the Wall will never be quite the same as the man who went out. He will be wiser but less cocksure, happier but less self-satisfied, humbler in acknowledging his ignorance yet better equipped to understand the relationship of words to things, of systematic reasoning to the unfathomable mystery which it tries, forever vainly, to comprehend.
--Huxley

Saturday, September 1

HAIL JOE ROGAN

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grcqs9cDuN8

I don't know why I ended up reading about this guy but he speaks some trippy interesting shit. This is some radio interview where Rogan discusses DMT, WOW, that sounds like some MASSIVE TRIPPY experience, definitely something to tell the kids.

Tuesday, August 28

Laboratory Notes (1943)

I suddenly became strangely inebriated. The external world
became changed as in a dream. Objects appeared to gain inrelief;
they assumed unusual dimensions; and colors became more glowing.
Even self-perception and the sense of time were changed. When the
eyes were closed, colored pictures flashed past in a quickly changing
kaleidoscope. After a few hours, the not unpleasant inebriation,
which had been experienced whilst I was fully conscious, disappeared. What had caused this condition?

--Albert Hofmann

Friday, August 10

"I HAVE BUT RECENTLY RETURNED FROM THE VALLEY OF THE SHADOW OF DEATH. I'M RAPTUROUSLY BREATHING IN ALL THE ODORS AND ESSENCES OF LIFE. I'VE BEEN TO THE BRINK OF TOTAL OBLIVION. I REMEMBER AND FERMENT THE DESIRE TO REMEMBER EVERYTHING."

best band ever?


This is what I got after searching for "BEST BAND EVER" on Google. Half of the results were people fighting over who is indeed, the best band ever. Morons. I just think is really cool I got TOOL in the results. I don't know why there's some site with Linkin Park in it. What does Linkin Park means? Why it is "Linkin" and not "Linking"? What the fuck is a linking park? Did you know the vocalist, Chester Bennington, had a crazy cyber stalker? Read more about that here.

Thursday, August 9

No drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we're looking for the sources of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for

drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.
--P. J. O'Rourke.

Wednesday, August 8

ABOUT THE SAME

The Beatles and Radiohead wrote songs about THE SAME THING. Yes indeed THEY DID. It's so obvious once you realize brouhaha's.... yes so obvious...











GIRL & CREEP




Think about it. It's about the same GIRL. The thing is we get the adulation, adoration side of said girl IN GIRL. THe other thing is CREEP. This time we focus in the guy. The creepy guy that masturbates thinking about her. You know it COULD BE YOU. YES. YOU FUFER***omg O: O: O: *******4*t*h***** **w*a*l**+l***lolololo1111111101010101010010101010101010101010010101,

/

Tuesday, August 7

John Lennon's best song would be about his own death.

Friday, June 29

Searching for an exit

My pain is constant and sharp, but I do hope for a better world for everyone. In fact, I want my pain to serve as an example to others. I want everyone to comprehend and learn. I admit this because I had a catharsis. My punishment continues as I gain deeper knowledge of myself, I am a reflection to others and knowledge can be extracted from my telling.

Has this confession meant something?

Why do we fall?

To learn to pick ourselves up.

Sunday, April 29

the artifact

I don't feel sleepy but my eyes do. I get ready and go out. Got the basic stuff: keys, cell phone, wallet and of course, the artifact. The doorman, Miguel, follows me as I approach the exit. He closes after me. He's rumored to be gay. He stinks. Like, literally, the guy smells real bad. He also has been referred as having a serial-killer face. And he does; he has that pedo-smile. Skinny, large balding head, dresses like a loser. I go out, irregardless, and start my way. I kind of went along the same path, to the right. It was a normal night, I like nights. There's a girl on the other sideway and I lay my stare on her until she enters the building across mine. She was pretty. The kind of girlfriend-pretty but has a nice ass, also. I remembered my mission and pull out the artifact.

I notice some guy walking towards me. A middled-age guy with a dog. I change pathways. I feel the effect almost immediately, like I do when on a good mood. Or when I really want to. Everything seems to be going slower. Even sounds. Some other people coming towards me, have to change again. I turn a corner and stop. Retrace my steps, I think. Retraced my steps.

When no one is looking I take off my shirt. I extend my wings as hard as I can, they feel sore. I managed to climb a tree an get on top. When sufficient altitude is achieved I start to plane and relax.

Everything seems slower and slower and slower. So much I feel time-dilatedness and everything starts feeling holy. Especially the air that is blowing to my face. Everything seemed so relaxed and I started getting fewer thoughts... I felt myself fainting.

Everything is l a y e r e d .

It was like my mind shifted it's attention to the right hemisphere, instead of the left one. But like, all the way. I felt the need to pleasure myself.

Monday, April 23

paraflux

If you also like 10,000 Days you must read this: http://toolnavy.com/showthread.php?t=46306.

10,000 Days review

10,000 Days is Tool's latest release and the closest to being the one they've always wanted to make, according to Maynard. I couldn't agree more, the anger and intensity from Ænima is still there but we have the spiritual and holy feeling that we only got in small dosages (e.g. 42 & 6) but is abundant in Lateralus. I see imbeciles arguing about the fact that Maynard's vocals are lame and the songs lack the spirit from previous releases, mainly Ænima. Well, the vocals take a background role but this is on purpose, the morons don't get it, this guy pulls a shaman act here and it's supposed to sound that way, but more about it later. There are even some trolls who claim Tool is now christian or catholic because of the lyrics, and the worst is, there are fools who buy it and feed them, but as anyone who actually thinks about it it's just another face of our favorite freak, MJK. By the way if you haven't realized by now, Tool is my favorite band and I listen to Tool EVERY fucking day. Until my ears bleed.

Vicarious (7:06)

As has been mentioned, this one is the first-single-to-be-released song, much in the vein of Stinkfist. To save you time, it's basically Tool at what they do best: catchy, weird-at-first-listen riffs, Maynard screaming off his lungs, funky bass lines (thanks Justin), trippy guitars (I love you Adam) and thundering, fast, crazy drumming (marry me Danny). The song is about the morbid fascination YOU have, yes, you, TV addict; grinning wide as the fire consumes the bodies, the shots go through the heads and the blood flows across the screen. We all stare in awe at the tragedies of others, so, why can't we just admit it? [Toolgasm: 6:36]

Jambi (7:28)

Another great and catchy tune, famous for a talk box solo by Adam, which gives the song a weird but unique tone. Apparently is about power corruption and some Sultan. I like this song a lot, gotta love the bass and shit, it makes me get up and dance like the head-banging-retarded freak I am, shine on benevolent sun. [Toolgasm: 6:00 (check bass)]

Wings for Marie (6:11)

Here you can appreciate the shamanic Maynard I was referring, at first the lyrics are almost undecipherable, and THIS IS ON PURPOSE. The guy even goes backstage in live performances. This, combined with mellow guitar and an overall relaxed tone makes a very atmospheric track that sets the way for the next song very appropriately. [Toolgasm: 4:10, not that jaw-dropping but it's the highlight of the song]

10,000 Days (11:13)

One of the three epic songs from the album, if you ask me. Check the vocals again. It's atmospheric. It gives a very unique feeling, one we're aren't used to getting from Tool. That doesn't mean it's bad, the whole song it's a fucking climax, and the rainy noises are well done. Try turning off lights and monitors and TVs and shit and think about your mother, if applicable. This is some intense, heavy emotional song, it must be heard at least one time alone, lights off and everything, concentrating on the sound only. I can't help but sing along when Maynard asks for his mother wings, definitely a cool and memorable moment. Now for all you guys on the internets that get mad about the "pro-christianity" message we are supposedly getting here, well, I won't elaborate but, one doesn't have to be a Buddhist monk to write a book about Shanti or whatever, In fact, I like how we get the mental image of Maynard in the congregation, looking to the "ignorant siblings" with disgust. [Toolgasm: 5:35 and onwards]

The Pot (6:21)

Another catchy one, a great song to sing along and dance to. It has a cool rhythm, mainly because of the bass, Justin really shines all over this album. The lyrics deal with hypocritism but I really haven't read them thoroughly, yes, shame on me. Anyway, I love the Ganja? P-LEASE! line. [mini-Toolgasm: 5:58]

Lipan Conjuring (1:11)

Segue. I get this picture of Maynard with some Dhalsim-like monks, all chanting and weaving around their prayer beads. It goes well with the theme of the album. This just shows how Tool never dwells on the same concepts and is always looking for new, weird shit to deliver.

Lost Keys (Blame Hoffman) (3:46)

Disorienting. Like you don't know where you are. Bright lights on your eyes. What the fuck? It really sets the mood for the next one really well, although can be skipped. I really like it, it's mesmerizing.

Rosetta Stoned (11:11)

Another epic. Music's great, lyrics are funny and one of the best I've seen and probably one of the best ever. Did I mention Tool is my favorite band ever? There's so much going on this one you'll want to listen to it again and again just to catch all the curious thingies and references all over. Basically it's a guy so high, DMT, LSD, Krispy Kremes and whatnot, he gets and abduction experience, and apparently, an apocalyptic message it's delivered to him by somniferous almond-eyed aliens, a very important one, but the guy's so fucked up he can't remember. Everyone who's been under the influence of psychological agents can understand. Maynard here pulls a a stand-up comedy act and it's good, It's like a satire. He didn't have a pen, and he shat the bed. Priceless. Won't spoil anymore, read the lyrics, it's worth it, instant favorite. [Toolgasm: 8:44 and again at 9:10 and AGAIN at 10:30]

Intension (7:21)

It begins with construction noises. People chattering, or rather, whispering. Eerie. Gives a sense of evolution, confirmed later by similar noises but electronic and technology-like, Danny produced a very cool effect here. There's some good drumming in the middle. I can almost see the primates building shit and stone tools. The lyrics say that we begin pure and only by will alone, we get to what we are today, but the vast majority of the population doesn't realize this and go about without reflecting their own existence. This song only sinks after like the fifth time you listen to it, but it's worth it, though, it's really mellow and kind of builds up to the next one. [Toolgasm: 3:55]

Right In Two (8:55)

This is the other epic I was talking about. The lyrics are very emotional and the felling all over is really good, specially when the music really kicks in because the first five minutes is like Intension was still playing. But! check from 5:22. You'll cream your pants. More construction noises and Stone Age-like drumming. That electronic kit or whatever Danny brought really paid itself. I swear I see the villagers from Age Of Empires (the first one, the best). The song puts the listener in the shoes of angels as they contemplate our human existence, and ask themselves puzzled and confused, why, if there are enough resources on the fucking planet we live in for everyone, there's, like, this human instinct to conquer, kill and take over everything, we can't seem to be satisfied, ever. Reminds me of the crazy psilocybin theories of Terence Mckenna. This is satire folks, and not the funny kind. Everyone should listen to this song and think about the message. Maybe this is the message Maynard talked about in Rosetta Stoned? I really like the "Repugnant is a creature who would squander the ability to lift an eye to heaven, councious of his fleeting time here" line. [Toolgasm: 5:22 and from then, multiple orgasms until the end]

Viginti Tres (5:02)

This is a closer, it's just some creepy noises with some weird, distorted, 3-syllable word at 3:24. It's worth the listen, though, lets the listener reflect about Right In Two and kind of reminds me of 2001: Space Odyssey.

This album, plus having great music, comes in a cool package. It's a cardboard-bound booklet partly covered by a flap holding a pair of stereoscopic eyeglasses. This is what that means. So it's definitely worth buying. Looking through the eyeglasses is somewhat cool, I guess you can do it if don't have anything better to do. /FANBOYISM

UPDATE: I finally figured how to use the cardboard-bound booklet partly covered by a flap holding a pair of stereoscopic eyeglasses, it's great! it's tricky to get the effect right, but once you do it's really cool. The image has to appear as one and only one, it's a the-right-angle-only-kind of optical illusion, plus concentrating on seeing only one picture so it appears 3D like.

Saturday, April 21

sometimes

Sometimes I feel like I have, you know, like, two sides of my personality, the critical but boring one and the funny but procrastinating one and it's like I have to find a zone for the two to coexist and reach a new level of reflection and de-personalization so I can crucify my ego and realize that all this that surrounds me is not important, I want to find transcendence by critically looking into myself but I don't want to get caught in the little things and get absorbed by this, how can I live if everything is sacred and holy? I have to be careful of where I put my fucking foot when I walk because I may kill an ant! oh for fuck's sake I need to relax and think! reflect; everything is but a mere medium to achieve a higher conscience, I must find inner peace. Everyday. It's not a goal, but a never-ending process, I must endure. If there were no rewards to reap, I certainly would've walked away, quit this fucking never-ending-always-pushing reality. And it's like I have this inner voices, different voices, they don't speak of the same, they don't even speak in same languages and SOMETIMES it's like a whirlwind of thoughts, a train of thoughts, a stream of consciousness I can't stop, but I don't want it to stop! I should ride the wave and be thankful that I can fucking breathe! breathe in the air, I'm alive and maybe all this pain is nothing but an illusion, I should embrace this desire to feel eternal and loose myself within the experience, every experience I want to experience everything, that which doesn't kill me makes me stronger, I HAVE TO ride the spiral of my human divinity AND still be myself. But just sometimes.

who is that?

When people see me drawing they always ask "who" am I drawing. I always sigh in my head because, I don't know, people seem to think that when someone draws it has to be a representation of something that already exists. It's more complex than that, I can start some doodle and not know what it'll be but it'll be something, it's like those surrealist guys who would start writing with no idea of what would be written, they would just start hammering those old writing machines and come up with all sorts of crazy shit. Here lies really interesting stuff because not even the author knows what's going to turn out. It's like a symbiotic relationship with my hand when I draw, the hand makes half of the work, or rather my right hemisphere helps me finish whatever it is I'm drawing. This is why I NEVER draw what I intended. I can think of how it will turn out, what it is about and it will have this and that but it's not like I get the picture in my head and then it copies to the paper. It's not that easy. But, well, that's the beauty of it because you never know what-you-gonna-get. I too, want to know how the drawing will turn out, sometimes it's better than what I initially intended, sometimes it's shit and I rip and spit on the stupid paper but hey, that's creativity. This is why, in part, I end up drawing weird shit like this:


People ask me who or what it is. I don't know what the fuck it is, ok? It's just something that came of the spur of the moment. It's an alternate dimension dog. It's some odd creature, it's whatever you want it to be.

why, hello there

Ok, for anyone who wishes to know the contents of this blog come directly from the artistic vein I suppose I have and everyone does, though I guess some never use it; this is not a diary but a recipient of rants and every little thing I consider worth of sharing with other humans, although the majority of posts could be induced by illegal substances and psychotic states of mind, so don't take everything here for granted because I can say what I want to, even if I'm not serious, and I hope this places captures all the oh so lucid ideas and concepts one seems to have trough the day but end in the trash can in half a page of scribbled notes or in the recycle bin in a .txt full of grammar errors because didn't have the time to check for the writing rules, the fantastic idea I just had appeared to fade away and well I can practice this language here, that's good, you can send me your opinions stating if you concur or disagree with my babble and you can also correct my usage of this foreign language, I like being wrong, I just hope all the crazy things and silly but amusing shit my supposedly right hemisphere comes up with gets stored here so I can read them another day and have a laugh, like the day I had a dream and I was in this machine controlled world (don't worry I won't reference Matrix, oh well) where some robotic guys wanted to get me, I didn't know what for but didn't want to find out either so then Snake from Metal Gear came and helped me and he gave me this razor that could cut anything it's funny because it looked like a normal shaving razor, just a tad futuristic and silver-like, anyway Snake rescued me and I was forever thankful. I made a drawing about it but it was shitty and don't know where it is anyway, all this shit gets accumulated in my brain and sometimes it's like I'm saturated so this is like an outlet you see, it's like a channeling session where I connect with that artsy vein and you know if one thinks things too much it's not healthy, like Maynard said, over-thinking and over-analyzing separates the body from the mind. I don't want that.

hola.

"If you look at the cycles of the moon, it starts as a thin crescent and then gradually waxes until it becomes full; then it gradually wanes back into another crescent and then it is gone. The moon reflects sunlight like humans reflect information. We wax and wane and when we become full moons, our egos are full. We think we have this knowledge when in fact, the information we have is pure. And how it reflects or shines off of us, is something we take credit for as though the moon could take credit for its brightness when, in fact, it is only reflecting light from the sun. We have to understand that we are ego-less just as the moon is without light. It and we are simply reflectors. The ego is not responsible for the information. It can reflect the information in creative ways, but the information itself is pure". ~Maynard James Keenan



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